Tag: disability

Thinking again that the main reason I have run into so many problems trying to deal with the NHS that I’m currently just having to go without treatment for some serious health problems is probably a combo deal.

Mainly consisting of (a) more things working against me wrt discrimination, and (b) much less/not as effective support available as a disabled foreigner trying to navigate an unfamiliar system. Set up so that it’s much harder to just find someone else to see who might treat you more like an actual person, rather than a weird and exasperating waste of increasingly limited time and resources.

Add in © getting sicker making it harder for your autistic ass to even hold onto communicative speech on a normal day–much less in a more stressful situation–and that can further complicate just about anything.

(And I have to say that the current state of the US healthcare system likely does not help with some perceptions there. On a couple of fronts. Kinda tying in with the too-popular scapegoating of “NHS tourists” as somehow responsible for the austerity undrrfunding mess. People working in the system are not magically exempt.)

At least I am less inclined to blame myself for all of the difficulties now, while well aware that probably 90%+ of people not facing the same combination of garbage totally would. Still very short on feasible workarounds, though.

the-adhd-society:

If you are a parent ADHD modifications.

If you are a parent of a child with ADHD (or even for yourself). It is OKAY to give accommodations or modifications in your home life. It is okay to work with your child to create a schedule or ways in which things are done around the house.

For example. I always hated doing the dishes, the feeling of stuff floating around was super icky and I hated it. Instead of telling me as a child to suck it up, ask your child WHY they don’t like. Make the accommodation of giving them gloves to use or a different type of brush.

If your child struggles with time management. Buy some clocks, set extra reminders TAlk to your child, ask them how many reminders and when do they want them before you are ready to leave the house. I.e. we are leaving in two hours, go take a shower, we are leaving in half an hour and a half start getting dressed. We are leaving in 30 mins, five mins etc.

You should not get mad at your child when they struggle with something if you have not spoken to them about the issue and accommodations that they need to make it easier.

This is so important for two reasons.

1) it is showing the child that with interventions their symptoms can be managed. It also shows that if something doesn’t work, you can try different things to help. There won’t be an internalization of “ I am lazy, I am dumb, I am bad”. It will instead be “ I need to try something else to be successful”

2) it models how to A) put into words the problem and how they are feeling. The child is learning to express with words (written or otherwise) and their issues are taken seriously. This will not only make your life easier but it will make it easier in school for the child to have this skill to say “ I am struggling with this because”. they might not have those communication skills yet but it will be easier for them to say I don’t want to do this right now because I am angry. Then just letting them have an adhd meltdown.

B) IT TEACHES THEM HOW TO ASK FOR ACCOMMODATIONS. This is SO So SO important. Whether they are in k-12 or not, being self advocates is one of the most important skills that they will learn. The child being active in IEP meetings or having the ability to go to their case manager and saying “ this accommodation is not working or this teacher is not giving me what I need”. This skill is so important. (Of course have them talk to you first before they go in lol). It is teaching them that their accommodations are nothing to be embarrassed about and that they need to be taken seriously. Which will make all the difference in college.

It also makes the difference in the workforce as well. Being able, as an adult to ask for accommodation will be very different than in education and the way to go about that will be different. But your child will already have that groundwork of being a self advocate and be able to speak about what they need in order to be successful.. and even if their request isn’t granted, the y will know that their success and self worth is not wrapped in their ability to complete the task well.

So, recap: talk to your kids (and yourself) about why things are bothering them and what can be done to make the tasks easier. Set up a plan and teach them to communicate their needs and stand by them. Take them seriously.

Feel free to post things that either worked or didn’t work for you as a child or a parent around the topic. It would be great to see what everyone has gone through.

Trump’s Public-Charge Rule Would Threaten Disabled Immigrants’ Health and Safety – Center for American Progress

autisticadvocacy:

“The proposed changes would exclude from permanent residence eligibility any person with ‘any medical condition’ who is also enrolled in government-subsidized health insurance, creating a dangerous Catch-22 for the disability community.”

Trump’s Public-Charge Rule Would Threaten Disabled Immigrants’ Health and Safety – Center for American Progress

stimtoybox:

poetic-poppy:

Inspiration porn like the oft used quote, “The only disability in life is a bad attitude” only contributes to the stigma both internalized and external that disabled people deal with on a daily basis.

I’ll elaborate; by saying that the only disability is a bad attitude, you are essentially saying that disabled people who don’t “overcome” their disability to society’s standards are not trying hard enough or worse, that they’re lazy.

We can internalize this toxic message and feel bad when our symptoms or limitations prevent us from achieving goals in the same manner as the abled person. It can lead us to work ourselves to the point of exhaustion in a non assessable way.

In short: if you give a damn about disabled people, stop spreading this highly toxic message and instead, acknowledge that the disabled person faces unique challenges that require accommodations and support to “overcome” and that there are some things that are not possible for a disabled person to do and that’s ok. We all have limitations and we have to learn to work within them.

That phrase also denies disabled people space to actually feel a range of socially-considered “negative” emotions in response to our disabilities and the ableism disability tends to provoke from other people and broader society.

In this ableist world, we’re going to have what looks like a “bad attitude” because society treats us as less than human for the crime of daring to show our disabled faces to the world and we can’t smile in the face of ableism. We’re going to have what looks like a “bad attitude” because we’re tired and in pain and are overwhelmed from trying to function in a world that doesn’t support us. We’re going to have what looks like a “bad attitude” because being disabled, even in the best of situations, can be a difficult thing to experience.

This pressure to be constantly smiling, to be cheerful, to “put a good face on it”, to be the “good” disabled person who doesn’t succumb to a “bad attitude” and never shows our anger/bitterness/frustration/pain gives us no space to express our own experiences; it requires us to bottle up our struggles and never seek sympathy or support.

Don’t get me wrong: I agree with every single word above. I just think that this particular phrase is even more toxic than is usually discussed. I think it harms disabled people on multiple levels that go well past ignoring our limitations into denying us space to express real emotions because we are told, over and over, that we are supposed to be disabled people without a “bad attitude”. Even though this is something I cannot possibly live up to.

bisexualbaker:

poetic-poppy:

Inspiration porn like the oft used quote, “The only disability in life is a bad attitude” only contributes to the stigma both internalized and external that disabled people deal with on a daily basis.

I’ll elaborate; by saying that the only disability is a bad attitude, you are essentially saying that disabled people who don’t “overcome” their disability to society’s standards are not trying hard enough or worse, that they’re lazy.

We can internalize this toxic message and feel bad when our symptoms or limitations prevent us from achieving goals in the same manner as the abled person. It can lead us to work ourselves to the point of exhaustion in a non assessable way.

In short: if you give a damn about disabled people, stop spreading this highly toxic message and instead, acknowledge that the disabled person faces unique challenges that require accommodations and support to “overcome” and that there are some things that are not possible for a disabled person to do and that’s ok. We all have limitations and we have to learn to work within them.

“The only disability in life is a bad attitude!”

“Yeah, your bad attitude about my disability is preventing me from getting the help I need.”