Tag: too real

neukpunk:

If you’re one of those people who thinks executive dysfunction only happens for things we don’t like (school, cleaning,) then please consider the fact that I’ve been meaning to plug my phone in for 20 minutes and I’m now at 2% and still putting it off to write this post ¯_(ツ)_/¯

kelpforestdweller:

snufcin:

u ever wonder how a usually physically healthy person would react if u transferred ur pain onto them temporarily…like how would they react?? bc it does feel bad to me but im so used to just pushing through it and coping with it that im not even sure how bad my symptoms are anymore? how do u rate pain when u’ve basically experienced it nonstop for five years??? uugh im just constantly doubting myself atm thinking im pathetic and that anyone else would think the pain is nothing and im being pathetic

i want the superpower to make doctors feel what i feel for an hour or until they say uncle, whichever comes first

h0shikohime:

One of the really, really frustrating things about being autistic is that you feel like you spend your life trying to reach some sort of unattainable middle-ground:

– We’re criticised for not making enough conversation, but when we do actually really get in to a conversation we are told we’re ‘too intense’.

– We’re often trained to maintain unbroken eye-contact during conversations, yet in reality too much eye-contact is called ‘staring’ and makes people very, very uncomfortable. 

– We’re encouraged to ‘express’ ourselves more, yet our actual, genuine emotional reactions are usually deemed ‘innapropiate’ or ‘unnescessary’. 

– We’re told to be friendly and confident when approaching new people, but are then warned that we ‘come off too strong’.

– We are told to try and make interesting conversation, but are also taught that speaking about our interests will only ever annoy other people. 

– We’re asked to explain our difficulties and anxieties, only to be told that these explanations ‘make no sense’ or that our worries are unrealistic and invalid. 

– We’re expected to force ourselves in to social situations that feel overwhelming and draining yet still somehow remain friendly, good-tempered and pleasantly sociable. 

– We are encouraged to develop good self-esteem, while at the exact same time being taught that everything about us is wrong.

I don’t hate having autism – I’ve never hated having autism. But I do hate living with the never-ending pressure to attain this mythological ‘perfect’ level of social interaction that simply doesn’t exist in my case.  

fullyarticulatedgoldskeleton:

Tired, but I have a post I want to write

About being the kind of person who constantly gets controlled and bullied by other people

And spending so much time wondering why you, specifically, are different, or what you’re doing differently from other people, and how to make it better

And why you can’t be funny without people hating you for it, or smart, or anything, and hyper analyzing yourself for reasons why

And then ultimately the reason is because “you’re not allowed to be anything”

It’s not because you did jokes wrong but because you’re not allowed to be funny at all

Or smart

Or insightful

You’re supposed to shut up and disappear

That’s what bullying is about

It’s not about real things, or about your self-improvement

It’s about teaching you to efface yourself so that it takes less effort for other people to silence you when they see fit

And even if it’s hard the only thing to do is just be funny and smart and wonderful anyway

Even if you know people will never stop hurting you or trying to stop you from being anything

Because being free is important

And because you know better now

You know that following the rules doesn’t stop people from hurting you, it just makes it easier for them to do it to you

I promise you it’s worth it to keep trying to Be

Because the alternative is being small, and limited, and afraid, and no less of a target for it anyway, and that’s a raw deal and you don’t have to fucking agree to it