Tag: yep

supernini235:

queerautism:

queeranarchism:

love-geofffree:

designatedheckingadult:

queeranarchism:

LOL NOPE
Europe is racist as fuck. Europe has armed gaurds and high fences on its borders. Europe makes it illegal to rescue refugees at sea. Europe locks up refugee children. Europe has killer cops that shoot teenagers of color. Europe is full of fascist politicians nostalgically fantasizing about ethnic cleansing. Not a day goes by without attacks on Muslims.
Fuck Europe.

Can confirm.

The problem with England (I can’t talk for the rest of Europe) is that our racism and our xenophobia and all our bigoted views manifest in a different way then America, and we use this to claim that it doesn’t exist, even when our country is built on it.

We are taught that the British empire was a good thing, and pretty much no one here knows anything about colionisation and our role in most current world problems.

But the amount of times that I’ve tried to talk about any issue within England and been shut down with the claim “well we’re not as bad as America”.

That’s why the trump protests were so important. We are constantly looking to America to justify our own bigotry. We’ll call America out on their unjust wars, and ignore the fact our own army and government was supporting them.

Listen, I like my country- I like that we have a rich history (not that I support it, but heck, everyone likes learning about the Roman Empire, doesn’t mean they think it’s a good thing), I like that we have countrysides and big diverse towns like London, I like that we love fish and chips and curry sauce, I love our old pubs and traditional pub food, I like that we have the NHS (though I dislike how it’s run), I like our sense of dry gallows humour, I like our film and tv industry, I love our history of theatre, I love our myths and legends.

But god damn are we historically an awful country, and have we ever tried to make reparations? Our actions are still affecting other countries and ruining life. I don’t like the empire, I don’t like what the monarchy stands for, I don’t like our politicians that spew bigotry and hate, I don’t like our press which are like vultures, I don’t like the power the BBC has to cover-up actual sexual abuse and rape, I hate Katie Hopkins and that she has any platform to spew her hate, I hate Brexit and that it was founded on hate, I hate how we think our lives are more valuable than that of refuges or immigrants, I hate that we don’t think that we are directly or indirectly responsible for a lot of the refugees and asylum seekers that exist today, I hate that we have a system that is actively leading to the deaths of disabled people and that even when investigated by the UN and told to change because we were violating human rights we refused, I hate how we support America’s bigotry and then use their country as a shield when accused of our own bigotry.

I hate that we, as a country, are incapable of accepting responsibility and making amends for our terrible actions.

Incredibly well put.

One of the tricky things is that every European country has their own fictional self image which it keeps repeating to convince itself it’s not a bigoted shithole.

In the UK it’s very much focused on being better than the US, being civilized and polite and stylish, while.. ya know… having a lot of blood on its hands and doing all the same racist and bigoted shit everyone else is doing.

In the Netherlands it’s focused on being ‘tolerant’ and gay-friendly and having semi-legal weed, while.. ya know…
having a lot of blood on its hands and doing all the same racist and bigoted shit everyone else is doing. 

In Germany it’s focused on having ‘learned from the second world war’ and being ‘better now, while .
. ya know…

having a lot of blood on its hands and doing all the same racist and bigoted shit everyone else is doing.

And so on.. every European country considers itself either an underdog or a pioneer or a peak of civilization or small and quirky and of course they all consider themselves so much better than the US while
doing all the same racist and bigoted shit everyone else is doing. 

https://metro.co.uk/2016/10/27/man-severely-beaten-after-being-told-to-speak-f-english-speaks-out-6218523/

I still remember exactly how it felt to read about this man being brutally asssulted, HIT ON THE FACE WITH A PLANK OF WOOD, in London, a city I lived next to and visited all the time, simple because he was speaking my native language in public.

I remember breaking down sobbing because of how many people in this country I love hate me so fucking much for being born somewhere else.

IIRC, there was another similar incident on the underground this past April.

So tell me more about the supposed lack of xenophobia and racism in Europe

Just throwing this out there, xenophobia is definitely a thing in the UK, I was discriminated against to the point I had to move flats, because I spoke Welsh outside of Wales. But you can also be discriminated against for speaking Welsh in Wales if the people around you only speak English. In the UK, white people will discriminate against other white people if they’re not exactly like them.

Source: queeranarchism

myceliorum:

clatterbane:

demonsanddogweeds:

owlygem:

autasticanna:

Facts that adults don’t tell you about bullying

– Communication doesn’t work on bullies. Telling a bully they’re making you feel bad is the wrong way to go. They want to make you feel bad. That’s the point.

– being kind to a bully doesn’t always mean they’ll stop. Sometimes it means they’ll just use your kindness to manipulate you while still continuing to bully you.

– not every bully has a sympathetically tragic home life. Sometimes people are just mean. Sometimes people just get off on hurting others.

– on that note, a tough home life is a reason, not an excuse. You don’t have to put up with bullying because somebody’s life sucks, just like you don’t have to let someone mug you because they’re broke.

– in order to forgive someone, they have to apologize first. If your bully has not apologized to you, you do not owe them anything.

– getting bullied as a kid can still mess you up in adult life. Maybe kids grow out of being bullies, but the marks they left often don’t go away.

– there are ways to get people to stop bullying you, but they almost all involve being mean back.

– as long as parents keep raising shitty bullying kids, there will be bullies. No amount of assemblies and hand-drawn posters will fix the problem. It’s the parents’ fault.

the only time I got a real life bully to stop was when I punched him in the face.

Some from my own experience;

-Even if teachers and the kids’ parents do their darndest to end the bullying with detentions and such, it might not work.

-Changing schools might not work, either.

-Fighting back might not work, if the bullies are strong guys and like to beat you up. I fought back, but got punched and kicked a lot back.

-If nothing seems to work, try to find a way to take courses in adult education.

Every situation is different, and so is what’s more likely to help. Sometimes nothing really does, besides riding it out the best you can. (And I know how much easier said that can be.)

I got two main approaches, neither of them remotely helpful.

At school: “Maybe try not being so weird”/“Ignore it!”

At home: “You must not have beaten on them enough, or they wouldn’t still be bothering you!” (Or, you know, maybe that approach is not actually appropriate in all circumstances, and might make it easier to paint you as The Real Problem 😩)

I’ll add that even in cases where bullies do get physical, they don’t necessarily have to be good at fighting for giving it back to them not to work so well as a deterrent. Sometimes they’re just sneaky. Sometimes they’ll carefully keep out of lunging range and throw stuff, after they’ve learned that getting closer is bad for their health. Sometimes provoking you into flipping your shit is apparently worth the beatdown. (Especially with the right audience. See also: sneaky.) And so on.

Expecting bullies’ motives and actions to even make sense to anyone but other people with the same mindset can be a mistake.

There is no one-size solution. I really wish I could offer one, myself. But, too many adults do want to think they have one–and it’s somehow a child’s fault if that’s just not working.

All this.  And also.  There will be adult bullies when you are an adult.  (Adults can also bully kids, of course.)  And if you run into the worst, they will be sophisticated, dedicated beyond belief to hurting people, and adept at what they do beyond what you may be able to imagine or believe is possible.

myceliorum:

bittersnurr:

fierceawakening:

fierceawakening:

windiskywalker:

violaslayvis:

The supposed different “generations” i.e. millennials/Gen X/boomers etc is just liberalism’s attempt to replace class analysis by framing the different generations as coherent classes with different interests. It conveniently fails to mention that there are working class & ruling class people in all generations.

By making all ppl of a certain age responsible for inflation & higher cost of living or w/e, the responsibility of the ruling class is obscured, to the detriment of the working class & to the benefit of the ruling class.

Most of the boomers I know are mushy liberal ex hippies at the very least.

The whole idea that “the boomers did it” without specifying which ones has always made me ?????

Also like… specifically on the issue of “taking care of this silver morass of cranky old farts is hard when our economy sucks” at least

Part of the problem is their parents gleefully fucking like bunnies after a war

That’s what “baby boom” means??

Millenials are technically the second lesser baby boom I think too? Like when I was in school my grade was actually the largest since the boomer generation. HALF of my town’s elementry schools are closed now because they didn’t need like 5 of them after we graduated.

Maybe that is why the boomers are blamed specifically. My age group would mostly have boomers as parents (there are so many of us because there were so many of them) so they are technically at fault for having us lmao.

Also there’s a lot of bigotry against old & disabled people hidden in that idea of boomers as burdens. (FWIW I’m late gen x, brothers also gen x (we straddle entire generation pretty much), mother earliest boomer, father silent generation. Not impressed with most ideas about generations.)

elodieunderglass:

starlight-science-soar:

elodieunderglass:

pervocracy:

lyycernment:

truffledmadness:

pervocracy:

London is at about the same latitude as Calgary, Alberta.  Madrid is at about the same latitude as New York City.  And Florida is at the latitude of the Sahara Desert.

Geography is weird.

Dude, the way sunlight works here in London makes it VERY OBVIOUS how far north we are ESPECIALLY WHEN IT’S TOO EARLY AND WE CAN’T GET BACK TO SLEEP BECAUSE OF THE STUPID SUNRISE.

(sorry about that)

I mean, if houses in England had shutters (like you would expect of any civilised country) instead of friggin’ curtains, the sunrise wouldn’t be an issue.

(sorry)

We don’t have shutters in the US (actually in New England we do but most of them are fake and permanently nailed open) but blackout curtains are less than $30 a pair and they’ll change your life.

Good Old Gulfie Stream!

wait what the shit london is as far north as calgary??

Yes, Northern Europe is very North indeed. It isn’t just due to the Gulf Stream, it gets wilder the more you learn.

The Scottish cities of Inverness and Aberdeen are on or near the 57th parallel, farther north than… Fort McMurray. And the Northernmost Functioning Year-Round Human Settlement – Svalbard – has milder weather in many respects than common-or-garden Canada. (Like, obviously Svalbard is the end of the world and you can probably see Valhalla from there, but Winnipeg has competed in the coldness stakes against Mars.)

fierceawakening:

nonbinarypastels:

nonbinarypastels:

nonbinarypastels:

Since I keep getting anons WRT multisexuals being able to use the terms butch + femme and positivity posts I’ve made for multisexuals who use these terms, I want to address that:

Now here’s the deal I’ll make with anyone who comes to this blog and takes issue with my posts: if you can refute these sources and provide me with actual evidence showing that the information is all bullshit and that multisexuals without a doubt have zero rights to use these words? I will be absolutely be happy to hear you out, read whatever sources you provide, reconsider my position on this issue, and apologize if I was wrong.

However anyone who comes into my ask box to complain without any legitimate argument + sources that show that multisexuals have no right to use these words (which “lesbophobe go die” does not count as, jsyk) is getting instantly blocked and I’ll be adding 10 positivity posts for butch/femme multisexuals to my queue just for you.

Deal? Deal. 🤝

This offer is still on the table, my pals.

image

Let me just casually bring this back around for y’all since I get a flood of asks ‘correcting’ me about who is/isn’t allowed to use the terms butch and femme literally every time I make a positivity post about the terms (none of which, btw, have had countersources – still waiting on those).

Also a reminder to y’all to read my byf/faq before you send in asks. This post was linked there, literally under a header that says “call me out”. I mean? 🤷

This is still so weird. Less than ten years ago, my gf and I called ourselves a butch/femme couple. We were both bi and both were open about it and NO ONE SAID SQUAT.

This thing is new.

moranion:

fierceawakening:

shytimesabandonableplatform:

fierceawakening:

discoursedrome:

fierceawakening:

http://kunaigirl.tumblr.com/post/173012902181/guayabaprince-gay-culture-is-speedrunning

things like this puzzle me just because finding real friends is so damn rare

if i had to exclude cishets from the running in principle, i’d be pretty lonely

i mean a lot of my friends are queer but dude what

this tumblr thing puzzles me more and more with each passing day

Hmm. I remember somewhere reading a bit by someone who had visiting a foreign culture where he didn’t speak the language and hit it off with the only other American there, and they bonded quite strongly over the course of that trip and made plans to meet up back in America, but when they did, he found that they didn’t actually have that much of a connection, and in the foreign country it was simply their unique shared experiences in a sea of foreignness that gave them a sense of closeness.

The linked post seems like it might be the same sort of thing. Friendships tend naturally to continue along at the same level of intensity until there’s a “breakthrough” that drops you down to a deeper friend level, and that can take a long time, but if you’re able to share a close personal experience with someone that the rest of society is unable to relate to – something that maies you feel alienated normally – that can drop you into a very high level of intimacy almost immediately. That can be valuable since it happens when it’s most needed, but it has the drawback alluded to in the story I mentioned: the initial similarity is rarely enough to support a lasting and functional relationship, so when the dust settles you may find yourself on extremely familiar terms with someone you just aren’t that into.

Yeah. That was basically my experience with the kink scene—since those were THE ONLY PEOPLE I COULD TRUST WITH MY HORRIBLE SECRET I trusted them immediately and fully.

I made a lot of real friends, yes!

but I also got way too close to some iffy people way too quickly. And found myself going “what the HELL?” fairly often when the shiny wore off.

That’s why I feel so uneasy when I see kids here going “queer GOOD cishet BAD.” Because the actual fault line for “this person is a true friend” isn’t “this person has similar life experiences to me.” It’s “this person is someone I consistently like and respect.”

That can be someone who shares a lot of traits with you OR someone who shares almost none.

This was also my experience with the kink scene, which was also my first experience with the Queer Scene (as opposed to just queer people, who I’ve been around all my life :P). Insta-connection based on a shared, deep, stigmatized part of How We Worked.

That insta-connection sure made a good bond for abusive people to fall back on. “Oh, she’d never rape anyone, she teaches consent classes, she’s one of us!” She was more involved in the scene so she had more connections, and I was the weird critical outsider (I thought I was an insider) and I had to be a liar because she couldn’t have done what I claimed. Except she did, and I hope she doesn’t do it again, but I have little confidence.

Be careful out there, folks. Someone can have all sorts of things in common with you, someone can “get” you on a truly deep level, someone can volunteer for wonderful causes and write amazing theory, and that someone can still abuse you.

100%. I stayed with an abusive girlfriend because I was a feminist and the other feminists around me kept saying “there is no power dynamic in lesbian relationships like there is in straight ones.”

Which my brainweasels interpreted as “whatever this is, it isn’t a power dynamic. You must deserve this.”

It took me a while to not give a damn what it was and decide it was ok to “fail at being gay.”

All great points above, but also, being queer/gay/lgbt/whatever doesn’t actually necessarily mean you’ll have the same experience being that as other lgbt people around you. That’s what confuses me, personally, when people go on these extended tangents about how great and necessary it is to have friends that are gay/women/your ethnicity/your whatever, etc., just like you, and how you’ll be instant friends bc of that shared experience, bc … it doesn’t really work like that?? 

so many lgbt people have the experience of being that – that’s completely different from my own. on top of that, there are plenty of lgbt people I just don’t like hanging out with for various reasons. also plenty of women i can’t stand. and plenty of nonbinary people. we may have smth in common, but we still have a bunch more things very much NOT in common.