I won’t stay silent anymore. Please help me raise $600 after leaving my abusive partner of 5 years
As soon as I left my partner, he texted my therapist saying I was suicidal which was a blatant lie and manipulation, and an attempt to have me unjustly hospitalized and silenced. I know I can live without him, and that’s why I left. I’m worried about financial fallout, but that’s not worth the pain I’ve endured for 5 years because I needed to survive.
This wasn’t my first abusive relationship, but I will make this my last one. Never again.
Please help if you can.
Cash app: $tiezesty
Paypal: paypal.me/tiezesty
And my Venmo is @tietie
Thanks so much for spreading this and supporting me.
Emily writes, “64oz Games is working once again to improve Braille accessibility in popular board games, this time in tabletop RPGs. This kickstarter will allow them to purchase a high resolution 3d printer to produce a polyhedral die set (D4, D6, D8, D10, D12, D20 & Percentile) with Braille as well as print numbers. This will also allow them to continue to produce high quality Braille teaching materials that improve Braille literacy world wide.”
There’s more to this than just putting Braille glyphs on the dice – they have to remain balanced! $10 gets you one die, $50 gets you a whole set. The rewards are danged cool, too, including Braille dice earrings!
as you may or may not be aware, I’m in charge of all western media vampire lore and if ur a white author who makes dark-skinned humans become light-skinned when they become vampires your story sucks sorry I’d say I don’t make the rules but in fact I do make the rules
Ann Rice we comin’ for you~! (I mean, we do get *lighter*, but even after a winter hiding from the outdoors I’m not paper white and I’m fairly light skinned compared to other biracial people I know).
lmaooo god yes please let’s take her down
Seconded.
Anne Rice is going to sue anyone that interacts with this post
This would be funnier if it weren’t so god damn true.
Hi everyone, my name is Gemma and I could really use your help.
As many of you may or may not know, I’ve been struggling a lot these past few months with my government, benefits and trying to keep my home. I have been trying very desperately to sort out my Universal Credit benefit, as my mental illnesses prevent me from working and just before Christmas, I had to attend a WCA (Work Capability Assessment) and my benefit was sanctioned and reassessed due to it, causing me to struggle with my rent and bill payments, I currently owe £179 to my rent and £241.73 to my overdue bills which have built up over the past few months.
My current U.C benefit is (£196 P/M) and on March 16th, 2018. I received the outcome of my assessment and I’m heartbroken to say that I scored 0/15 points on the assessment, meaning that I do not qualify for the limited capability for work elements of U.C or any additional support. This decision was brought forth due to the fact that I can wash and dress without much difficulty and can converse with people, even with my anxiety and stress. (All evidence of this has been attached to my YouCaring). I have tried to appeal this decision several times but before I am able to do that, I need to wait for my government to do a “Mandatory Reconsideration” on it and then wait for the outcome of that before being able to start the appeal process which can take up to 4 – 6 weeks, often longer.
These past few months have been a roller-coaster of hell for me, I’ve almost lost my home (I am still in danger of being homeless if I miss a rent payment) and I have been on the verge of starvation a few times due to myself not being able to afford groceries. I’ve tried my local council, food banks and churches for help but I have exhausted all available help from them and they aren’t able to assist me anymore. I also don’t have any family or friends to turn to for help or live with and I sold most of my belongings a few months ago when all of this started.
I really am so sorry to have to ask for help again, but with my rent urgently needing to be paid on
Friday, 30th March along with my other bills.(My rent being £179 to be paid fortnightly or £358 P/M). I really am struggling and I don’t know when my benefit will go back up or when I will hear about the reconsideration and until then I really need help with my rent, bills and getting groceries for April and May.
Please consider helping out by donating, if you can, to my YouCaring or to the PayPal and Ko-Fi links below, sharing would also mean the world to me.
I also understand that everyone is struggling, but even just £1/$1 makes such a difference. And if you don’t agree with this post or “e-begging” please don’t comment/send hate, just ignore this and be kind. Thank you 🙏💖💖
Please consider helping out guys if you possibly can. My rent and bills need to be paid in 8 days (March 30th) and I urgently need help to pay them and get groceries. 🙏💖
**Clarification: My rent is £179 a fortnight or £358 P/M. I am trying to pay it in advance for the entire month of April & May, so I don’t have to worry about being evicted during the 4 – 6 weeks that I have to wait for my WCA appeal.
I’ve just rather hilariously been called “problematic” over one of my essential oil posts, by a supposedly qualified aromatherapist, who says I am peddling misinformation by telling the literal actual factual truth about EO safety and like excuse you, all I’m peddling here is questionable pun based paranormal erotica. The rest of this shit I do for free, at substantial cost to my time and emotional labor.
You on the other hand, I see your young-living cult link in your profile, I see you villain.
ignoring your own wants and needs is not a healthy way to show love
people worth loving will respect your boundaries
people worth loving will not want you to set aside your own wants and needs to make them more comfortable
‘having no boundaries at all’ describes a person who is very hurt, not a person who is very virtuous
suffering for others’ comfort is not how you be a good person, it is just how you become very hurt
sometimes you need to make others uncomfortable in order to get your needs met
your needs are more important than others’ comfort
your comfort is equally important to others’ comfort
making other people uncomfortable is not, in itself, ethically wrong or morally dubious
can i add a thing:
what really helped me with boundaries is to realise that not having/showing them didn’t just hurt me, but also hurts my friends. and that interacting with someone that doesn’t state their boundaries is not at all ‘comfortable’ or ‘easy’. that’s a perspective that was so alien to me, i never realised other people might genuinely want to know about boundaries, and be genuinely distressed about overstepping them. but when i did, it really changed how i approached this!
‘my needs are more important than others’ comfort’ is absolutely true, but can be hard to embrace. but what about: ‘if i don’t state my needs, that makes interacting with me more difficult and hurtful’? we don’t usually want people we care about to hurt for our sake. if we find out that they did, we’ll feel really bad and guilty, like we should have been able to prevent it by being more attentive. guilt ping-pong can happen. everybody gets to feel toxic. that’s not good!
also, if i don’t state needs and wishes, i leave the onus of steering everything to the other. if they care about my needs and wishes, it is now their job to gently pave the way for me, to make me feel safe enough to express them, or, worst, to somehow guess them, and none of this is making it especially easy for them, on the contrary!
it can be very hard and it’s okay that it’s hard. (like you’re not being “unfair” by being bad at stating boundaries forex.). but, basically, establishing boundaries and needs isn’t just good for me, but it’s good for both, and
in healthy relationships
will often make both equally more comfortable. sometimes it’s not ‘my needs vs. your discomfort’, sometimes it’s a win-win.
I flat out cannot be relaxed around people who I cannot trust to maintain their own boundaries. NOTHING makes me more anxious and more stressed than the idea that someone might just….not indicate something is not okay with them.
Because here is the thing: I know damn well this stuff does not go away. I know damn well that it builds up, slow and toxic and it TELLS.
And to start with it’s horrifying to think that I’ve been inadvertently harming someone. And then just to follow up?
It WILL blow up in my face some day. I KNOW this. (As in, it has happened. Multiple times.)
I cannot read minds. I am less capable than your average person of catching Subtle Cues. (And they’re not good at it.)
So Hell. Yes. Figuring out your lines and making them known and backing them up will be a huge relief to anyone worth worrying about.
I need to get word out about Skype A Scientist, a free program that matches scientists and teachers for 30-60 minute Q and A sessions about the scientists work!
Obviously, a very serious, political post dealing with some very serious, political issues.
But lol at “He had a German name, so no.”
No, but having taking a German language class, I can tell you: They are damn difficult to pronounce. Like, you have to *really* stretch your vocal cords.
[ID: collection of tweets from Amanda Hackwith @ajhackwith reading
“If you’re fuzzy on why changes to the ADA is such a big deal, I get it. I’m keenly aware of what being abled blinds you to. I’m here to introduce you to the thing that dominates my husband and I’s life: Logistics. Hey. Abled friends. This thread is for you. #HR620
Disclaimer: I am not physically disabled. My husband is. He has used a wheelchair since birth. I’m using ‘we’ in here because that’s how we’ve experienced it, and this is shared with his permission. OK? Ok.
The reality of living with a disability is Logistics. We don’t just do something. You figure out if we CAN do something. And then try to chase down the secret hidden puzzle of how WE do it. Because, I guarantee you, we are the exception. We are always the Exception.
So: join us. We leave home. We don’t call for an accessible taxi because that will take an hour. We can’t take a zipcar because there’s no hand controls. Walking through the door is Logistics.
We take a bus, praying that no one else with a wheelchair, walker, baby carriage, grocery bag, or big-ass backpack has already taken up the two accessible spots on the entire bus. Two. If so, we’re out of luck.
Or we take a hip, tech-will-set-us-free rideshare. There is no accessible option in the app. We pray that the ride that comes won’t drive off when they see a chair. That the folding chair will fit.
Maybe we walk home. We fought city hall for neighborhood curb cuts last year! Only fancy condo construction has torn them out again. For months. So we walk in the gutter of a busy industrial street.
We see a show. We can’t buy tickets online. We have to call to see if one of the five accessible seats in the theatre is available. There’s only one ‘companion’ seat. We aren’t expected to have friends.
We book a hotel. We have to investigate how crappy the accessible room is. (It’s usually a less desirable retrofitted room.) How a ‘normal’ room is laid out. If we can ‘get away’ with being treated as normal. For once.
We fly. We introduce ourselves to the attendants. We PROMISE we won’t be a bother. That we won’t need assistance. That we won’t need to rely on the rickety chair they want to strap him to, Hannibal-style. We make the attendants nervous.
We fly. We successfully board, but the bathroom is twenty feet to the back of the plane. We don’t have our chair. We hope we don’t need to pee for the next nine hours.
We want to do a fun tour of a new city/country/landmark. We spend hours calling tour companies, emphasizing how low fuss we are, how independent we are, how we’re one of the ‘cool’ disableds, if only they have room to fold his chair with the luggage. We promise to be good.
We want to eat at a special restaurant. It’s in a historical building. We crawl on our knees and throw the chair up the stairs to eat there anyway. There are stairs and there are stares. We are everyone’s free entertainment.
We eat at a restaurant. It’s accessible, sure! Just call ahead and Jimbob will throw a board across the steps for you to roll up. Or there’s an accessible entrance! It’s the loading ramp, out back. Through the pee-soaked alley and trash cans. Can’t miss it.
We eat it a restaurant. It’s totally accessible! Except for the bathroom upstairs. You can hold it until we get home, right honey?
Work has a social event. It’s held at one of the above ‘trendy’ restaurants. But HR totally apologizes, okay? Be cool. We can be cool.
We want to go home. We become invisible to taxis. He hangs back until I flag one down and glare the driver into submission.
W apartment hunt. All the cute ground floor dog-friendly units are lofts with stairs. All the accessible units have been rented out to able-bodied people because ‘no one wants them’.
We apartment hunt. The ‘large’ bedroom doesn’t leave enough room to either side of the bed for a wheelchair to sit. The glitzy new apartments have bathroom doors too small to get through.
We apartment hunt. The building is totally accessible! Except for that one tiny step. In the common room. To all the amenities you’re paying for.
And this is important: We are white, educated, financially secure, fairly young and healthy aside from the wheelchair. In other words: BEST CASE SCENARIO. We literally are operating and interacting with the ADA on every privilege we can manage.
If you’re surprised by what I’ve said, keep in mind the majority of the disabled community has it so much worse. With so much less resources. Even WITH the existing ADA. #HR620
No imagine how much worse, more hostile, the world will be if every target of discrimination had to ask each business, in writing, one at a time, to please not break the law. And they have 90 days to ignore them. And another 180 after that. Every restaurant. Every store. #HR620
Imagine you had to beg every business to allow you to exist. Imagine people complaining about ‘nuisance lawsuits’ and ‘support peacocks’ to you. Your existence is a nuisance. Your existence is over legislated. Your existence is unnecessary. Now call your damn senators. #HR620 “
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