I see that a lot here in tumblr-land whenever someone says, “hey, I’m autistic and I am not like that / don’t like that / take offense to that” in response to a post about “suffering from autism”, poster then turns around and says “I don’t mean you …”
Then they go on to describe ME as “that other kind of autistic”.
“the low-functioning kind, that can’t talk and have meltdowns and suffer so much” (well, I don’t suffer, but they speak as if I do)
You know, the ones that it is safe to insult or ignore because we act really strange so we aren’t really people and our opinions don’t matter (they don’t have to consider our feelings because well duh we can’t have any cause we’re not really people). You know – the “low functioning” kind that can never live alone so are a burden and it’s such a shame that people have to deal with us. And it’s always backed up by “I have a relative that is one of those and no matter what his parents try they can’t make him be normal so he is really suffering”, or “I teach/take care of that kind and no matter how many times I abuse them they still won’t act how I expect them to”. Of course they don’t call it abuse – to them taking away communication devices, toys, food, and rewards is how you get ‘them’ to do as you say; it’s not abuse, it’s “training”. Except it is abuse to the autistic. That’s why they scream and yell and stamp their feet and do all the other meltdown things. They are trying to tell you that they are being tortured, from their point of view.
You see, most of the “low functioning” autistics they are talking about are not suffering from autism, they are suffering from torture and abuse by parents, teachers, and caregivers. It’s often legal torture and abuse, but it has the same effect as if it weren’t.
The people who say these things are usually the worst abusers. Teachers and parents and relatives that see nothing wrong with locking a child in a closet to teach them how to behave, even though being locked in a closet scares the shit out of the kid so they can’t think and therefore cannot learn anything from the experience. They see nothing wrong with tying the kid’s hands down so they don’t flap and “look like a retard and embarrass me”, even though that flapping is what is keeping the kid from exploding because they have been thrust into a fast food place during rush hour and all the noise is overwhelming them. They think nothing is wrong with forcing the kid to be fully dressed at all times even though the touch of cloth is overwhelming the kid’s sensory processing disorder, because “they have to learn to live with it like everyone else”.
Denying Baby a candy that she can see, with no other reason than “it’s almost dinner time”, would be abuse. She has no sense of time, candy is for eating, and things that are in front of her are for her. She will not learn to wait, she can’t because it requires a sense of time to understand. So we don’t put the candy in front of her. The parents/teachers I’m discussing here are the ones that would put the candy out, slap her hand for trying to take a piece, then complain about how much she is suffering from autism when she has a meltdown because they tortured her. Usually they would add how rough life is for them having to deal with it.
Taking me to the mall is abuse. These same parents/teachers are the ones that say “they need social exposure” and force the autistic into social situations in spite of the autistic’s reaction. I cannot and never will be able to handle more than a few people at a time. When I was a little more capable I could go grocery shopping – in the middle of the day in an area where no one else would be shopping at that time. Put me in a place where people are close enough to touch and I will be jumping up and down squealing and waving my arms around as if trying to fly. And no amount of “desensitization” will change that. And it won’t change it for that five year old that the mother is dragging on a leash while he kicks and punches the floor, yelling. You don’t do that. It’s abuse, not “training”.
Anyway, enough ranting for now.
Next time you’re tempted to say “I mean the other, low functioning, kind that suffer from autism” just stop and admit you don’t know what you are talking about.
Disclaimer: I have not been subjected to “desensitization therapy,” but I am autistic and have sensory processing differences.
People will talk about putting autistic kids through “desensitization therapy,” but real desensitization therapy is a treatment for phobias. Phobias are pathological; the therapy works by placing you in the presence of the thing you’re afraid of, but you’re still in control and will not come to harm. Over time your brain will stop associating the thing you were afraid of with danger.
Sensory processing is not pathological. It is a physical sensation in reaction to sensory input. You can’t train it out of someone. It’s not a matter of association; it’s a matter of direct harm.
If I hit someone, and they flinched, I would not continue hitting them until they stop flinching, then declare them cured. I would apologize and not hit them again.
But for some reason, people think it’s okay to do this to autistic kids. For some reason, hurting children is considered acceptable if the child is autistic. It’s baffling and horrifying.
I find this stuff maybe even more frustrating in a way, after dealing with many years of easy bad assumptions that my overload reactions must really be coming from anxiety/agoraphobia. (If not just me being an asshole and purposely making things hard on the people around me–and/or later, having psychotic episodes.) And that got handled about as badly as you might expect, with professionals providing the ammunition. They also continued down the same paths when it was making the situation that much worse.
In that case, there was at least some excuse of ignorance, up to a certain point. That was also before the possibility of autism was really on the radar dealing with people who looked like me on the surface. I didn’t even know any of the sensory stuff was legit until I was around 30. Now there is absolutely no reasonable excuse for treating known sensory issues the same way. None. It is so abusive, and it’s not like better info is that hard to find. If people were primarily interested in actually helping.
This misplaced “desensitization” approach is also such an excellent way to give someone lasting real anxiety, besides trouble with learned helplessness. As I put it before:
It’s not just that treating overload as anxiety does nothing to address what’s contributing to the overload. Though that is certainly a problem.
It’s also that, IME, assuming it’s all anxiety is a very good way of producing actual anxiety that wasn’t already there.
Especially if some people want to blame you for not trying hard enough when–surprise!–what tends to help anxiety doesn’t do much for sensory overload.
That turns even uglier in some ways when the ones doing this don’t care to try to understand the differences, they’re that eager to play the martyr for having to deal with the person they’re treating abusively 😐
No excuse. Maybe especially dealing with children.
Unfriendly fucking reminder that the best predictor of mass shootings is not mental illness, but being an angry young white man who has recently experienced rejection and has easy access to guns.
Bringing this back because it makes terrible people angry. And I’ll add a note to all the people saying “But you’d have to be mentally ill to do that!”: Mental illness is, by definition, abnormal. Does “mediocre white boy is so entitled that he resorts to violence when told no” really sound particularly unusual to you?
I devoted my entire graduate studies and thesis on mass school shootings, multiple murderers, and criminal psychology and I can tell you that this is in fact completely true and is suported by an unbelievable amount of emperical, quantifiable data that I slaved over for years. 💯
[Image text: “#autismawareness How would you feel if your parents were raising money to research how to make sure nobody ever has a child like you?”]
Cancerwareness: How would you feel if your parents were raising money to make sure nobody ever has a child like you?
Cysticfibrosisawareness: How would you feel if your parents were raising money to make sure nobody ever has a child like you?
Taysachsawareness: How would you feel if your parents were raising money to make sure nobody ever has a child like you?
Do you realize how ridiculous this sounds?
Maybe your fucking parents care about the troubles and issues you’ve suffered and hope another child doesn’t have to suffer you absolute morons.
You’re making a common but very dangerous mistake by comparing autism to cancer and chronic illnesses. Unlike cancer, autism is a fundamental part of how our brains are built, which means that autism cannot be separated from who we are as people. Autism isn’t an illness, it’s a neurotype – it’s something we are, not something separate like cancer that is happening to us and which is inherently negative. When you want to remove or cure our autism, you’re saying that you want to cure or remove a central part of who we are, a defining part of our personalities and how we experience the world, and that’s a very dangerous sentiment to have towards your child.
The suffering associated with cancer is caused by cancer.
The suffering associated with autism is not caused by autism, but by how society treats autistic people.
Stop comparing them.
If you don’t want an autistic person to suffer, just stop making them suffer.
@bloodblonde89 you literally called autistic people a cancer you fucking piece of shit
No, they literally did not.
man these people have never met a low to mid functioning autistic person have they? Their entire perception of it is the “Oh you know I get overwhelmed sometimes and loud noises frighten me uwu” type of person (who may or not actually have autism) who are so common on tumblr.
Literally every person in this conversation except @smallswingshoes and bloodwhatever actually IS autistic so, yeah, I’m pretty sure we have a pretty good idea what the fuck we’re talking about.
If I had a dollar for every time someone played the “I bet you don’t even know any REALLY autistic people” in these conversations, I could get me a gluten free pizza. At least one.
Do not presume to speak for us “low functioning” autistics over the voices of “high functioning” autistics simply because you think my life should be horrible. You are making judgements about my life based on your point of view, not mine. Please shut up.
to add my bit:
actually sometimes I end up in the middle of the floor, naked and sobbing, hoping from foot to foot because I can’t stand to touch ANYTHING even stuff that normally feels nice.
actually sometimes when someone yells at me I have an acute stress response complete with flashbacks (those are not just for ptsd though you can give me that too if you yell at me)
actually sometimes I claw my own skin til I bleed when I meltdown from being ‘overwhelmed sometimes’.
actually sometimes I can lose parts receptive language and not be able to read or understand spoken language from being overwhelmed.
actually sometimes I’ll agree to anything to make someone stop talking to me because their talking is too much or I’ll say whatever I think they want to hear to ensure they won’t yell at me even if it compromises my physical safety.
actually I’d really like to have more control over my life and so I could leave bad situations and be a good little tax paying member of society, maybe even have kids or a career!
it’d be nice if instead of preventing autistic people from existing you’d spend all the time and energy and money trying to ACCOMMODATE US RATHER THAN DESTROY US.
I AM fucking autistic (and even low to mid on your bizarre and nonsensical scale that shows you in fact do not understand how we function at all) and I’m telling you loud and clear right now that despite all that, and all the stuff I haven’t mentioned that sucks, that my pain is NOT FOR YOU TO USE AGAINST OTHER AUTISTIC PEOPLE.
it’s not for you to use to silence people when you don’t like what they say and it’s not for you to use to say other people like me should not exist.
Autism is having a different brain, not a disease, you can’t change our autism without destroying everything that makes us who we are. And who we are is valid and worthwhile.
It hurts when you lose someone you love, does this mean we should try to cure love? Yes, being autistic can hurt, but that’s why we want you to help us, the same way you try to help other people are in pain–but not destroy them, not prevent them. You cannot prevent autism without preventing autistic people. You can prevent cancer without preventing the humans who might have it from ever existing.
We keep telling you, over and over, that you’re the ones hurting us, you’re the ones who can help, that you’re the ones who are refusing to do so but any time we do you always say the answer is that we should be eradicated. Stop.
The ‘cure’ IS ACCOMMODATION. That is how you can help us be safer, happier people with fewer ‘issues and troubles’ we’ve suffered. That’s how you help keep another autistic kid from suffering. We’re never going to be like you, we’re never going to be your ‘normal’ but there is SO MUCH that can be done to change the world that hurts us if you would only listen. If you really care about autistic pain, LISTEN TO US.
But instead of helping, you use our pain to argue we shouldn’t exist at all.
And why the hell should people who’s autism looks less scary to you not get any of the compassion you claim to have for those of us who’s autism you call severe? Why does the ‘high functioning’ autistic person get thrown complety under the bus because I get overloaded more often? Because my meltdowns are are scarier or more often? Why do their voices not count–even for themselves? Carving us up into static categories based on how much we can look like you is a complete misunderstanding of autism, but even if you’re going to do it…why does one category get silenced because the other category exists? They get to talk. They get to describe their experiences and even if you refuse to believe they can have any insight into other autistic people…they sure as fuck have insight on themselves. Stop using some of us to say the rest have to shut up. And stop pretending you understand us better than we do. Stop implying that there’s ‘real autism’ and then people who need to shut up and toughen up and stop being ‘babies’. It’s gross.
one last time: LISTEN TO US DON’T SILENCE US. ACCOMMODATE US DON’T ERADICATE US.
I see that a lot here in tumblr-land whenever someone says, “hey, I’m autistic and I am not like that / don’t like that / take offense to that” in response to a post about “suffering from autism”, poster then turns around and says “I don’t mean you …”
Then they go on to describe ME as “that other kind of autistic”.
“the low-functioning kind, that can’t talk and have meltdowns and suffer so much” (well, I don’t suffer, but they speak as if I do)
You know, the ones that it is safe to insult or ignore because we act really strange so we aren’t really people and our opinions don’t matter (they don’t have to consider our feelings because well duh we can’t have any cause we’re not really people). You know – the “low functioning” kind that can never live alone so are a burden and it’s such a shame that people have to deal with us. And it’s always backed up by “I have a relative that is one of those and no matter what his parents try they can’t make him be normal so he is really suffering”, or “I teach/take care of that kind and no matter how many times I abuse them they still won’t act how I expect them to”. Of course they don’t call it abuse – to them taking away communication devices, toys, food, and rewards is how you get ‘them’ to do as you say; it’s not abuse, it’s “training”. Except it is abuse to the autistic. That’s why they scream and yell and stamp their feet and do all the other meltdown things. They are trying to tell you that they are being tortured, from their point of view.
You see, most of the “low functioning” autistics they are talking about are not suffering from autism, they are suffering from torture and abuse by parents, teachers, and caregivers. It’s often legal torture and abuse, but it has the same effect as if it weren’t.
The people who say these things are usually the worst abusers. Teachers and parents and relatives that see nothing wrong with locking a child in a closet to teach them how to behave, even though being locked in a closet scares the shit out of the kid so they can’t think and therefore cannot learn anything from the experience. They see nothing wrong with tying the kid’s hands down so they don’t flap and “look like a retard and embarrass me”, even though that flapping is what is keeping the kid from exploding because they have been thrust into a fast food place during rush hour and all the noise is overwhelming them. They think nothing is wrong with forcing the kid to be fully dressed at all times even though the touch of cloth is overwhelming the kid’s sensory processing disorder, because “they have to learn to live with it like everyone else”.
Denying Baby a candy that she can see, with no other reason than “it’s almost dinner time”, would be abuse. She has no sense of time, candy is for eating, and things that are in front of her are for her. She will not learn to wait, she can’t because it requires a sense of time to understand. So we don’t put the candy in front of her. The parents/teachers I’m discussing here are the ones that would put the candy out, slap her hand for trying to take a piece, then complain about how much she is suffering from autism when she has a meltdown because they tortured her. Usually they would add how rough life is for them having to deal with it.
Taking me to the mall is abuse. These same parents/teachers are the ones that say “they need social exposure” and force the autistic into social situations in spite of the autistic’s reaction. I cannot and never will be able to handle more than a few people at a time. When I was a little more capable I could go grocery shopping – in the middle of the day in an area where no one else would be shopping at that time. Put me in a place where people are close enough to touch and I will be jumping up and down squealing and waving my arms around as if trying to fly. And no amount of “desensitization” will change that. And it won’t change it for that five year old that the mother is dragging on a leash while he kicks and punches the floor, yelling. You don’t do that. It’s abuse, not “training”.
Anyway, enough ranting for now.
Next time you’re tempted to say “I mean the other, low functioning, kind that suffer from autism” just stop and admit you don’t know what you are talking about.
So oh my god, so I’m on Spotify on my tablet, and there is a small option at the bottom of the player that will make you choose to choose where to cast Spotify to play on, I always see my PS4, but I see a Google Cast device listed now and I’m tempted to play some music and play it on this random Google Cast (I guess it’s from someone else’s house) I really wanna do it oh my god and see what happens
I created a whole new account with a disposable email and created a playlist filled with memes for this. im ready.
Update, im playing Spin Me Right Round, I also played Mad World and Gangnam Style so far, there has been no pauses nor has it disconnected yet
THERE HAS BEEN A PAUSE. THEY HAVE PAUSED. SO CONFIRMATION SOMEONE IS LISTENING. Stopped when I was playing ‘In Da Club’ I have resumed it and skipped it to The Next Episode
In fear of it probably disconnecting soon, I’m gonna play My Time Is Now
20 seconds into All Star playing on spotify chromcast and chill and they disconnect you
THEY FU C KING FOUND MY PS4 ON THE NEARBY DEVICES LIST AND NOW THEY ARE PLAY I NG THEIR FUCKING MEME MUSIC ON ME
THEYRE FUCKING PLAYING THE FRESH PRINCE OF BEL AIR THEME IM SCREAMING
THEYVE PLAYED FRESH PRINCE NEVER GONNA GIVE ME UP SANDSTORM AND NOW THEY’RE PLAYING THE THEME TO 1960 SPIDERMAN
They played Bring me to life and now they’re playing See You Again. I think the mystery spotify person is playing their last song for me.
They have disconnected from my PS4 and now it is just silence. Always Remember the amazing mystery spotify player. I enjoyed our time meme’ing. This is forever a highlight for me.
Trump on Wednesday announced on Twitter that he will nominate Christopher A. Wray as the new director of the FBI.
Sen. Mark Warner (D-Va.), vice chairman of the Senate Intelligence Committee, said on CBS This Morning that the nomination was an effort to distract from James Comey’s upcoming testimony.
Wray is a lawyer who served as assistant attorney general in the DOJ’s criminal division under President George W. Bush.
He currently serves as a partner at the law firm King & Spalding, and was New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie’s personal lawyer during the Bridgegatescandal. Read more (6/7/17)
Attorney General Jeff Sessions allegedly proposed his possible resignation to Trump in a recent meeting amid an increasingly fraught working relationship, ABC News reported Tuesday, citing anonymous sources close to the president.
According to the ABC report, Trump remains so angry with Sessions over the latter’s decision to recuse himself from all matters related to ongoing investigations into Trump’s widely rumored ties with Russia that he “lashed out repeatedly at the attorney general in private meetings.“
Sources told ABC News the president personally blames Sessions for the expanding scandal, which now counts multiple congressional inquiries, a special counsel and an FBI investigation. Read more (6/6/17)
As former FBI Director James Comey testified (or gave his beginning statements, however the hearing works) today, Donny-boy nominated a replacement for Comey, who’s a lawyer who’s been involved with Russia’s government-owned oil company Rosneft.
Allegedly, acting Attorney General Jeff Sessions—a man who had recused himself from involvement in the ongoing investigation into Russian ties, having revealed that he had met with Russian diplomats during the campaign without the consent or knowledge of Congress—has suggested he should resign now.
All of this, coming after the resignation of National Security Adviser Eric Flynn amidst allegations of his own Russian ties, revelations that Trump’s tax returns from several years ago included investments and land-holdings given to him from Russia, the past career of Chief Campaign Organizer Paul Manafort lobbying on behalf of Russia in Ukraine before the Crimea Annexation, Trump’s giving a Russian delegation sensitive information considered confidential even to allies like the UK and a National Security Agency contractor’s leaking of information to the media, which supposedly shows proof of Russian ties.
But given the administrations frequent lies and changing of stories throughout these first five months and the firing of both the previous Attorney General after her refusal to implement the Muslim Ban and James Comey after the investigation took off, there will be resistance from Donny-boy and Friends. Congress better do the right thing or face unemployment after the Mid-Term Elections of 2018.
There’s this mythology of competence and dreaded boringness around being middle aged – that if you’re over 35, or god forbid 40, you don’t make stupid jokes, you sleep reasonable hours, and you’ve surrendered all connection to the wild life you lived as a young adult.
Let me just tell you it’s not true. I know, y’all are looking at your parents and you can’t imagine, but I swear to you it’s not like that. (And your parents probably wait until you’ve left the house, too.) We are just as fucking nuts as we were at university, we’re just more skilled at hiding it, now. And we only mostly know what we’re doing, and that’s from years of practise. It’s sure as fuck not universal.
So, you know. Just a thing to consider when writing older individuals.
Urocyon's Jaunts 2.0 
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