You know how 1st world feminists get told that they don’t need feminism? They’re told that they should be glad they’re not “really oppressed” like the women in 3rd world countries. That things could always be worse.
You know what my mother tells me? She says I don’t need feminism because I should be glad I’m born in an urban city of Pakistan. She says, at least I wasn’t born in a rural area where girls are married off to men twice their age. That things could always be worse.
And our house maid, Shabana, who was married to her uncle at 15 and, at 18, has 2 children, she doesn’t even know what feminism is. She was told by her father that she should be glad her husband doesn’t beat her and hasn’t thrown tehzaab (acid) at her. That things could always be worse.
Am I the only one seeing a very disturbing pattern here?
OTHER PEOPLE HAVING IT WORSE IS A SHITTY EXCUSE NOT TO MAKE THINGS BETTER FOR EVERYONE
I remember reading Reading Lolita in Tehran, and one bit that really got me was the author talking about how she and some female friends were discussing the regime and someone said something like, “At least we’re not in Somalia or Saudi Arabia. We’re treated like queens compared to those women.”
Again, this is revolutionary Iran we’re talking about. The woman speaking was not allowed to leave her house without a head covering.
I live is Saudi Arabia (I’m Egyptian though) and I’m getting the same concept drilled into my head.
“At least you’re not living with the badou. You’d be forced to cover your face too and you’d not be able to leave the house without a ma7ram (a male relative/husband). You’d be like a prisoner there.”
Excuse you? I have to cover my hair and wear a black full-length abaya at all times and I’m not allowed to be seen with a non-relative male in public, risking banishment and whipping if I’m caught doing that, I can’t drive (that might change soon, although the restrictions on it are more sexist than the driving ban ever was), I can’t even buy my own SIM card because it has to be linked to a male’s Iqama (residency card) so Dad has to do that for me. My parents are subject to constant public admonishment because I wear coloured hijabs and my school’s dress code regulations include full-length sleeves, even in the middle of summer, shirts that cover the back of your pants and full-length pants or skirts – as in, not even showing the calves. Even though we’re in a separate building from the boys.
Gonna stop ranting here because this is getting too long but I hope I made my point sufficiently clear. Regardless of where you are or how much equality there is, feminism is always necessary for everyone.
You know how 1st world feminists get told that they don’t need feminism? They’re told that they should be glad they’re not “really oppressed” like the women in 3rd world countries. That things could always be worse.
You know what my mother tells me? She says I don’t need feminism because I should be glad I’m born in an urban city of Pakistan. She says, at least I wasn’t born in a rural area where girls are married off to men twice their age. That things could always be worse.
And our house maid, Shabana, who was married to her uncle at 15 and, at 18, has 2 children, she doesn’t even know what feminism is. She was told by her father that she should be glad her husband doesn’t beat her and hasn’t thrown tehzaab (acid) at her. That things could always be worse.
Am I the only one seeing a very disturbing pattern here?
And this is something western non-religious men are incredibly prone to doing. They think women here have equal opportunity compared to women in the east, so women here should ‘be grateful/humbled’ (even though they don’t say it like that, it stems from holding deep down the sentiment OP indicated). This is how non-religious men are still misogynistic and patriarchal. You can spot one when they say one of the following: i support feminism but not the current (or western) form of feminism/current feminism has taken it too far/i am an egalitarian. They will have underlying sexism.
They think women here should be “grateful” that they (men) have given us so many rights and that we should stop asking for more. Men have said this at every step of feminist progress, and the implicit threat under this is that if we are not complacent, if we keep asking for more, they will take what they have “given” us away.
Boozhoo (hello), my name is Ken, I am a disabled Ojibwe artist from northern Wisconsin. I am writing this post because I am having a hard time making ends meet and any donations I could possibly receive at this time would be greatly appreciated. Recent events have left my bank account depleted and my cupboards bare, I have some food but it will not last and I still do not know how I will cover all the utility bills.
I do have PayPal, that is really the best way to donate at this time, the email I use for that is: baapimakwa@gmail.com, or you can click here.
Miigwech (thank you) everyone. Working hard to at least get caught up and still coming up short, every little bit helps.
Urocyon's Jaunts 2.0 
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