Day: November 2, 2018

vampireapologist:

I think the most healing thing my therapist has said to me was that I’m allowed to be angry and bitter about slipping through the cracks my whole life. I was so obviously and desperately in need of help from kindergarten to 12th grade, and only once did anyone respond, when I was 12, and then I went to middle school and fell through the cracks again. I got detentions for talking out daily in elementary and middle school. I broke down crying multiple times in class as a 17 year old in HS, which is, you know, not normal. I never did my homework, failed multiple classes every year and did summer school, all while ranking in the 99th percentile in state testing.

And nobody said “this isn’t right. someone pay attention to this girl.”

instead most of my teacher’s and a lot of my friends’ parents labeled me a problem child and couldn’t wait for me to be gone.

and I’ve spent all this time thinking “well, I’m getting the help I need and deserve NOW! It’s time to move on! Don’t focus on how, if someone had paid attention, I may be attending a college with a full ride scholarship right now, maybe have my dream job already, wouldn’t have spent so long suffering and suicidal.”

But my therapist told me, not only was it okay for me to be angry that literally all of the adults in my life but my mom and friend’s mom failed me, but she was also angry FOR me. And that I was allowed to be angry at everyone who let young Molly Anne slip through crack after crack. And that being angry and accepting that I was failed would help me move on.

And it has.

You’re allowed to be pissed off about the bad things that happened to you as a kid. You’re allowed to ask life “hey, what the fuck?” It’s part of healing.

onceuponaprettyhedawolf:

rootlessnessandmotionsickness:

furiousgoldfish:

rage is bigger part of healing than forgiveness will ever be

Truth. Learning that you are allowed to be angry about what was done to you is such a big part of healing. Learning you are allowed to feel all your feelings is so important. You need no ones permission to be angry about what happened to you.

As someone who has dealt with a lot of various types of abuse, as well as other truamatic life events; this is huge. After I ran away from home, I was finally able to feel what I want when I want without being scolded. Be angry, be sad, be depressed, feel your emotions. If you don’t they’ll just bottle up inside of you until one day you explode on someone you shouldn’t have. My Mom imparticular made me feel like I couldn’t be sad or angry at anything that was happening to me, that it was all normal & I should just accept it. Learning & knowing that all your feelings & emotions are valid is a huge step in anyones recovery.

supernatasha:

hot take: immigrants don’t need to love this country or swear loyalty to it to “deserve” to live here. they don’t need to work harder than anyone else, they can sit at home if they want, and they’re allowed to take full advantage of whatever healthcare or education any citizen has access to. they pay the same taxes, they own the same property, they created support systems and histories and entire lives here. that’s all that should matter.