Day: May 24, 2018

lord-kitschener:

tomcats-and-tophats:

@thisisbeabe jumping in on this reply chain the only way this stupid website will let me —

Firstly, as everyone else has kindly pointed out, this is about bi people who only date the same gender describing their same gender attraction as gay, while also retaining the bisexual identity due to its personal significance to them.

Nobody here is suggesting that identifying as “bi lesbians” or “homoromantic bisexuals” isn’t ridiculous. Nobody here is disagreeing in that it would be inappropriate for a bi woman to say “omg I’m so gay for my boyfriend” (but it is mysterious that this is seen as an inevitability for us to the point of demanding we alter our colloquialisms even surrounding our same-gender attraction 👀). It’s about language and ease of relating to material realities.

Would you suggest that a bi woman marrying another woman refer to all aspects of her marriage as a “bi marriage” instead of a gay or lesbian marriage? Should we add a caveat to the specific way we may experience attraction every time it comes up? When advocating for our own rights and lives purely within the context of our same-gender attraction do we need to add the caveat that we aren’t “fully” gay, even when the people oppressing us (often violently) don’t care enough to make that distinction? Because surprise, bi people describing our attraction and relationships with people of the same gender aren’t the reason that homophobes disrespect all of us.

To suggest that, say, women who only ever date women, who experience all the struggles of a woman who only dates women and only wants to spend her life with women, is committing an egregious betrayal by technically retaining attraction to men whilst identifying her attraction to women through common language (eg. “I can’t wait to get gay married/she’s so pretty I’m so gay/I love the gay community!”) despite that being a non-factor to the actual trajectory of her life, is impossible to divorce from the idea that the love a bi woman has for other women is less whole, genuine, and valuable, than the love of someone who is “truly” gay/a lesbian. That we have to qualify our love in a completely different way that makes it distinct from yours, despite it impacting our lives from the legal to the personal in identical ways.

This is NOT me, nor the OP, saying that the individual identities of “lesbian” or “bisexual” don’t matter, and in fact they said quite the opposite, by the statement that it’s important to respect the bisexual identity of a woman who only wants to be with women – and likewise, respect the lesbian identity of a woman who only wants to be with women even if she has complicated feelings on men. (I think the person replying directly above you was talking about the emergence of distinct lesbian and bisexual communities, specifically, though I see how their phrasing could be alarming). But all while respecting that both women, through their love of women, are experiencing gay attraction and the struggle that comes with it.

Also it once again places the blame for straight men’s violent entitlement on women and our perceived misdeeds. Str8 guys will harrass wlw whether or not some bi woman says “I’m gay for my girlfriend,” because straight men learned that they are entitled to harrass and bully women into giving them what they want from a misogynist, homophobic society, not from LGBT women.

Source: tomcats-and-tophats

memecucker:

i started reading “Feminine Fascism: Women in Britain’s Fascist Movement, 1923-45″ by Julie Gottlieb and I feel like the subject matter of the book is pretty relevant when it comes to understanding the idea of what people consider reactionary “white feminism”. Like not only did British fascism seemingly have a higher rate of female participation compared to continental European versions but its idealogical variations even had certain kind of twisted gender egalitarianism in the sense that many British fascists believed women were as equally responsible as men to devote the entity of their spirit towards defending “the nation” against subversive hordes of lower classes, foreigners and Jews (especially in the context of the counter-revolutionary activities conducted by the British right in the context of the 1926 General Strike).
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the-kalamity-kid:

libertarirynn:

Real talk.

When I told my mom she had such a huge panic attack and spent the next few years telling me I’m crazy while I went to therapy and took meds

Then she wonders why I don’t go to her for help or trust her to do what’s best for me

Closer to my experience, too. I never knew when my mom was going to totally flip her shit, and that didn’t exactly encourage trust talking about much of anything important.

When she walked in unexpectedly and saw that I’d been cutting when I was maybe 14, she screamed and bellowed up in my face for at least half an hour straight–and wanted to get me locked up as suicidal. Thankfully the therapist I was being forced to see actually listened to what I was saying when I could talk again, didn’t think that was an appropriate response, and talked her down.

(Not the only occasion either, and I was supposedly the Family Crazy Person 🤔 At least I did manage to shut down instead of melting down that time, or it would have been a psych unit for me anyway.)

Let’s just say that reactions like this are not so likely to encourage the people around you to openly discuss personal issues with you. Especially kids who are having a hard enough time already. Paternalistic platitudes are almost encouraging by comparison.

Source: libertarirynn

urbancripple:

neilnevins:

Mr. Rogers is a perfect example of doing something small and easy to accommodate those with a disability or making someone more comfortable that makes all the difference to them

An image of Mr. Rogers feeding his fish. The image reads:

“Mr Rogers made a point of mentioning out loud when he was feeding his fish on his show after he got a letter from a family whose blind daughter asked him to do so because she couldn’t tell if the fish were being fed.”

Below the image of Mr Rogers, the text reads: “One girl and her fmaily wrote to tell us there was a special reason why she wanted me [Mr. Rogers] to talk about feeding the fish each day.

“Dear Mr Rogers,
Please say when you are feeding your fish, because I worry about them. I can’t see if you are feeding them, so please say you are feeding them out loud.”

Katie, age 5

(Father’s note: Katie is blind, and she does cry if you don’t say that you have fed the fish.)

Since hearing from Katie, I’ve tried to remember to mention out load those times I’m feeding the fish. Over the years, I’ve learned so mcuh from children and their families. I like to think that we’ve all grown together.“

End Image Description.

Source: ultrafacts

idreamanocean:

graaaace:

I know this website is so american-centric but I want to get this out there because the referendum is fast approaching.

On the 25th of May in Ireland, we’re having a referendum to decide if the laws in Ireland that make abortion illegal will be removed or will remain.

I just want to say how important it is that we vote yes, to remove these laws from the constitution.

As of now, abortion is illegal in the Republic of Ireland unless the life of the mother is at risk of death, including suicide. It is also illegal to travel abroad for an abortion or even learn about where they can get an abortion outside of the state. Those who do so can face up to 14 years in jail.

There have been terrible things that have happened to women in Ireland that could have been prevented by allowing them to have an abortion.

One such case is of Savita Halappanavar, who went to hospital with back pains, suffered a miscarriage and died in hospital seven days later. Savita and her husband, Praveen, asked several times for an abortion but were denied because the medical team deemed her life not to be in danger. They were also told “this is a Catholic country”, and so Savita died.

There are countless of other cases and stories of Irish women who have been denied abortions or who have travelled to the UK for abortions.

Every year over 170,000 women leave the country for an abortion or order abortion pills online, risking their lives. Those who leave the country are mailed back the dead foetus.

These women face so much. Only a couple of decades ago, pregnant, unmarried woman were being locked up in laundries, where they were forced to work there for the rest of their lives away from a society that shamed and disowned them. Their babies were often given away or mistreated. They babies that didn’t survive were buried in unmarked graves, as were the woman.

Things like this could have been prevented by abortion. But my country doesn’t seem to care enough about the lives of women to help them and prevent this.

You don’t have to be Irish to reblog this. But please help spread the word and help us vote yes and change our laws for our women

There are just a few things I need to correct.

It is not currently illegal in Ireland to travel for an abortion. Women cannot be prevented from travelling to access safe and legal abortion services in other countries.

Legally the IFPA can provide you with information on abortion services abroad in a face-to-face-counselling session. It is however not legal to provide this information over the telephone.

Each year an estimated 5,000 women travel abroad to access safe and legal abortion services. More than 170,000 women have travelled abroad to seek a termination since 1980.

It’s important that we do not sink to the levels of the NO campaign and misreport facts or falsehoods.

Please Vote YES tomorrow!

REPEAL THE 8TH!