Witnesses say they asked Britney why she shaved her head and her response was, “I’m tired of plugging things into it. I’m tired of people touching me.”
i can never not reblog this
T-Pain: “That was the most beautiful thing in the world. Do you know why she was shaving her head? Because it was so important to other people. She is like, “Listen. Don’t touch my hair anymore. Stop touching my hair.” People were like, “We’ve got to make your hair before you go outside. You can’t leave.” She went … “Now I don’t have hair. What you going to do?”
The older I get the more her breakdown seems less ‘unbalanced’ and more ‘completely understandable’
Month: July 2017
ultimately i think kindness is the most radical thing you can do with your pain and your anger. it’s like, you take everything awful that’s ever been done to you, and you throw it back in the world’s teeth, and you say no, fuck you, i’m not going to take this. you say this is unacceptable. you say that shit stops with me.
humans are fucking terrible and this awful world we live in will fucking kill you but if you are kind, if you are brave and clever and try really hard, you can defy it. you can impose on this bleak and monstrous structure something beautiful. even if it’s temporary. even if it doesn’t heal anything inside you that’s been hurt.
i’m gonna sleep and i’m gonna wake up and i swear by everything in this deadly horrible universe i’m gonna make someone happy.
i’ve seen a number of comments and tags where people feel that they must swallow or repress their anger in order to engage in kindness. that is not at all what i am recommending here. radical kindness is an expression of anger. it is not passive. it is not repressive. it does not require you, in any way, to forgive those that have fucked you up. it does not require you to be quiet.
it just requires that you be kind. viciously. vengefully. you fight back. you plant flowers. give to charity. play games. pet someone’s dog. scream into the dark. paint and write and dance, tell jokes, sing songs, bake cookies. you have been hurt and you don’t have to deny that hurt. you just have to recognize it in other people, and take their hand, and say: no more. enough. fuck this. no more.
have a cookie.
i will say this again: we are all going to die. the universe is enormous and almost entirely empty. to be kind to each other is the most incredible act of defiance against the dark that i can imagine.
it just requires that you be kind. viciously. vengefully.
Bolding for emphasis. Because I am angry at the state of the world right now, so very angry. And I am trying to channel that anger into helpful, kind actions.
BI WOMEN, THEIR HISTORY AND CONTRIBUTION TO OUR COMMUNITY MUST BE PRIORITIZED AND CHERISHED
I’m all about the cherishing, but the word “prioritized” makes me feel weird and uneasy.
I don’t love the exact phrasing either, but I reblogged it because I get a strong sense from certain corners of Tumblr that bi women are sort of… annoyedly tolerated as Less Awesome than Real Lesbians™
I reblogged this for the idea that our contributions matter in their own right, rather than as some kind of copy that needs knockoff names and only matters when it’s time to *siiiigh* bring out the cheap knockoffs too
fun fact
today is the 111th anniversary of one of the most ridiculous events that ever happened in pretty much all of recorded history and what is definitely one of my favorite things ever
please read this
What is your opinion on white people adopting poc?
guava-pussy-deactivated20181119:
Stay away from our precious babies
my adoptive family literally made me feel so special and gave me so many opportunities I wouldn’t have had otherwise. And they worked tirelessly to make sure I was proud of who I was and what I stand for. I learned so much about loving differences and acceptance being brought up in such a diverse. To this day, my white adoptive mother (see also, my only mother) is the most open minded, loving , least judgmental person I know. My whole aspiration in life.
There are definitely people out there who won’t make the effort to truly care about the beautiful blood that runs through the COC that they’re raising but every time I see it being knocked as a whole I’m left feeling even more out of place and rejected by not only the black/white communities but even the adopted community.
Don’t invalidate my lifelong experience please, friends!
My adoptive family literally gave me life. Without international, interracial adoption, I might have grown up in the state orphanage in China, not being fed or held or cared for. I might not have lived very long at all. Luckily, I was adopted by a very loving white family, and I complain about my parents sometimes but I love them. I’ve gotten so many opportunities and have had an amazing life that I would not have had otherwise.
This backwards as fuck mentality hurts people. For some, it is/was a matter of life and death. If you think denying children the opportunity to have a loving home is “protecting pocs” or whatever bullshit you’re trying to spew, you’re not being progressive. You’re being a fucking asshole.
You realize that not everyone is as lucky as you right?
Not letting white people adopt POC children will just reduce their luck by a severe degree. Do you want kids to be adopted by a loving family, or do you want them to rot in a system where they don’t have any hope for the future?
Adopted children are wanted. There’s no doubt in their mind that maybe they were an accident. They know their family wanted them. Children stuck in the adoption program think they’re unwanted. Preventing a family, whatever race they might be, from adopting that child is preventing a child from being loved.
Like fireproof said, “This backwards as fuck mentality hurts people. For some, it is/was a matter of life and death.
“
I have a friend who was abandoned in a Chinese market as a newborn. She was put up for adoption and adopted by a white family who loves her and helped her grow to her fullest potential. If they were prevented from adopting my friend, she probably wouldn’t have gotten a chance to be the woman she is today.
Don’t reduce the luck of these children by preventing them the possibility of having a loving family. If the children are so precious, as you say, (which they are), then why would you prevent them from having a family?
Friendly reminder that the idea that you should only adopt within your own “race” so that they can grow up within their own “culture” (race and culture being synonymous in this line of logic) is a white supremacist idea.
…It is a little more complicated than YES WHITE PEOPLE SHOULD ADOPT KIDS WHO AREN’T WHITE or NO WHITE PEOPLE SHOULD ONLY ADOPT WHITE KIDS.
There’s a number of white Christians who explicitly want to adopt not-white kids from other countries to ~civilize~ them and ~bring them to Jaysus~. The results range from “bad, but the kid survived to adulthood and needs therapy” to “tragic newspaper headline”.
I’m sure there are plenty of other white people who want to adopt not-white kids to do the same thing, though they’re not thinking about it as clearly- they want to “do some good in the world” or “save kids from a war-torn country”, and they’re not clearly thinking about what that entails.
These people can do a lot of damage. (cw: child abuse, child neglect, child death, all in the name of Christianity.)
Other white people – like the parents mentioned up above- can be fantastic parents for whatever kid they choose to adopt. They can choose to love and support their kid and learn what they need to to help their kid.
It’s not all or nothing here, this discussion needs some nuance.
15+ Un-Bear-Ably Cute Momma Bears Teaching Their Teddy Bears How To Bear
Momma Bear
Trump replaces chief of staff Priebus after six-month run with Kelly
Obstetric violence is institutional violence. Break the silence.
I’ve heard of some really fucked up forced birth malpractice of doctors. Sharing for awareness. This is more fucked up than circumscision. This is as fucked up as doctors returning your baby to you with a botched circumcision after you made it clear they are absolutely not to circumsize him (which yes, has also happened, which helps me to believe some doctors are fucked enough to do these things). Doesn’t matter if you’re a feminist or not, this is a human rights issue by any standard. (I don’t know anything about the organization advertising itself here, not endorsing or condemning it). Share for awareness. Medical treatment to requires consent, because the second it doesnt, some really fucked up shit is possible, orders of magnitude worse than even this.
…I have questions, now
This looks like some serious shit.
My mom has a story similar to this about me.
When they found out I was going to have kidney issues (extra ureters, nothing lethal), a secondary doctor demanded my mom have me three weeks early. This was supposedly when my lungs would be ready enough to immediately go into surgery.
After 16 hours of labor, the original doctor was informed and told my mother how that was unnecessary since I couldn’t be operated on until 8 weeks anyway. My mother had me early for no reason, and they had to monitor my lungs just to be sure I was alright.
The secondary doctor also demanded weekly amniocentesis on me. Mom says you could see on the monitor me visibly distressed and wiggling away/trying to push away the needle. It got to the point where my mom grabbed the doc’s wrist and told her no more.
While not as violating as the stories mentioned above, I want to confirm this does happen and if you feel unsure about a doctor at any point that it’s not wrong to switch to one you feel better with. Pregnancy is a complicated thing and the last thing an expecting mother needs/deserves is to be mistreated.
Also
Women I’ve seen talk about this often express it as “don’t medicalize birth”.
But this kind of thing happens all over the hospital.
And it shouldn’t happen to anyone. Ever.
For My Autistic Boys
Info dumping =/= “mansplaining”!
Info dumping is (sometimes compulsively) sharing information about a special interest subject, and if you’re like me then you have a lot of those.
Don’t feel bad for info dumping, you aren’t being misogynistic, you’re just being passionate about what you enjoy!
This is really really important. I see so much negativity when it comes to info-dumping and I figured searching it up on this wonderful website would at least have something good but all I saw was negative posts about men info-dumping. And it made me sad. So yes a hundred times to this.
mansplaining is incredibly rude, condescending and/or patronising, often about simple concepts that the listener (usually a woman) likely already knows. as you say, infodumping is about special interest topics and isnt intended to patronise the listener it’s just compulsively sharing info.
i hope the people who listen to your infodumping dont perceive it as mansplaining
Here’s a simple way to tell the difference.
MANSPLAINING
Me: huh. I really liked Skyfall, and I never expected I’d enjoy James Bond. Maybe I should watch Spectre.
Mansplainer: *sniff* ACTUALLY, you should forget the Daniel Craig movies. He’s not a REAL Bond. Now if you want ACTUAL James Bond you should get the Pierce Brosnan movies. Craig was only cast to be eye candy to reel the women in.INFO DUMPING:
Me: huh. I really liked Skyfall, and I never expected I’d enjoy James Bond. Maybe I should watch Spectre.
Info Dumper: *gasp* you liked Skyfall?! Did you know it’s part of a reboot because the original movies started getting really far from the Ian Fleming novels? They’re really good, especially the Pierce Brosnan ones, but they kind of became their own thing, you know? The reboot started with the new Casino Royale and (etc., I’m actually exhausting my store of Bond knowledge here)One of these people wants to show he’s better than me, a filthy female casual. The other one is hype because HOLY SHIT I LIKE THE THING. TOTALLY different vibe.
Mansplaining tends to come with gatekeeping. “Actually, only Connery is the True Bond. Pierce Brosnan was eyecandy and his movies were so cartoonish they necessitated the reboot, which still doesn’t live up to the Connery movies.”
In which I find out one of my friends actually knows James Bond. Which is WAY MORE THAN I DO, lol.
I also tend to think it’s not mansplaining unless the woman being mansplained to actually knows more about the subject.
An info dump runs that risk – if an autistic dude who really, really loves something a woman has expertise in is talking to her, he may infodump at her and she might perceive that as mansplaining. My son does this to me. (Aside from videogames, I know more about everything than my son does.) But the thing is, when I provide my input and explain what I know based on my expertise, my son is happy to hear it and incorporates it into his next infodump on the subject, because he loves the subject matter and he loves to learn new things about the subject matter. He doesn’t get into an argument with me or try to patronize me after I’ve established that I know more than he does. (And no, doing this to a parent isn’t a male/female thing, it’s an autistic thing – I used to happily do this to my dad on subjects he knew more about.)
The infodumper wants to share everything they know, and secondarily maybe establish themselves as someone knowledgeable on the subject. The mansplainer wants to establish themselves as someone more knowledgeable, and are almost always trying to establish power over the person they’re talking to. Men also do it to other men all the time but are more likely to back down when the other man proves himself to know more (and, if they already know the guy is considered an expert, they might not start); they’re more likely to argue back against women. The infodumper will be fine with finding out that you know more about it than they do because it means they will get more information about their favorite subject. The mansplainer will be very much not fine with it because it cuts off their ability to establish Me Manly Expert, You Appreciative Girl.
And yes. All attempts at gatekeeping are actually a means of trying to establish power over others. Sometimes for legit reasons. (”I don’t think you can call yourself a Christian if you’re more interested in stopping gay marriage than stopping poverty”, says a big Jesus Christ fan who is upset that others in the Jesus Christ fandom seem to be completely ignoring the canon in favor of popular fannish headcanons, because she is a fan of Jesus Christ in canon and wants to see the rest of the fandom actually pay attention to the original texts and follow them. Or, to remove the amusing metaphor, because she thinks that no one who claims to be following Christ should be given the privileges associated with being known to be a Christian if they aren’t in fact doing anything Christ would have wanted them to do.) But attempting to exert power over others for good reasons still counts as attempting to exert power. Mansplaining frequently includes gatekeeping because gatekeeping is a means of establishing yourself as an expert.
Urocyon's Jaunts 2.0 
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