lordpudi:

daeranilen:

real-pcys:

real-pcys:

hot take: moms need to learn how to listen to and comfort their daughters without making everything about their own traumas

a classic example

daughter: hey this thing you do bothers me very much and i wish you wouldn’t do it

mom: well my parents abused me and im not even as bad as they were and i had to sit through it so you gotta sit through whatever i do to you too

a common variant

mom: well i’m having a really hard time right now and you know that i’m doing my best and that i didn’t mean to hurt you ergo you are in fact the asshole for asking me to consider your feelings and change my behavior during this hard hard time i’m having

my favorite version of this

mom: well you aren’t the only one having a hard time, my life fucking sucks and so does the lives of thousands of other people. your pain is invalid! and of course by telling me this, you are suggesting It’s My Fault. Yes, EVERYTHING is my fault you treat me so horribly!