autismserenity:

solitarelee:

autismserenity:

oodlenoodleroodle:

autismserenity:

bizexuals:

certifiedacehet:

autisticdixon:

spyrothediscourse:

i’m glad there are people making posts explaining why it’s bad to compare lgbt people (specifically trans people, specifically trans women) who don’t want cishet aces and aros to be part of the lgbt community to terfs but also it pisses me off so much that that even needs to be a thing………… don’t compare trans people to terfs literally for any reason especially not trans women….

terfs arent just “bad mean hatekeepers who dont want trans ppl to be in the community just like u dont want ace/aros to be in the community uwu” theyre like… violent abusive bigots who actually have a history of attempting to drive trans women to suicide, doxxing trans women and trans girls to get them fired or outed to their bigoted families, celebrating the death of trans women, advocating for trans women to be denied basic human rights, advocating against trans people being allowed to medically transition and spreading literal 100% false lies about the process of medically transitioning, spreading literal actual fucking nazi propaganda, spreading around articles that literally call for the extermination of all trans women, actively condoning eugenics, physically assaulting trans women, sexually harassing young trans boys (and sexually harassing cis women in relationships with trans women), threatening trans boys with abuse and rape if they continue to support trans women, and even congregating in huge groups offline in the real world to have conferences about how trans women and trans people in general don’t deserve equal rights….

if you compare trans people to terfs because they don’t want cishet aces and aros in the community you’re a disgusting transphobe and transmisogynist and you have no idea how serious of a statement you’re making

@certifiedacehet @the-mega-trans-sjw

THE FIRT PERSN TO CALL HATEKEEPERS RHETORIC SIMILAR TO TWERFS WAS A NON-ACE NON-ARO TRANS WOMAN WHO WAS (RIGHTFULLY) PISSED OFF AT AN APHOBE WHO’S RHETORIC WAS INDISTINGUISHABLE FROM ONE THAT A TRANSMISOGYNIST HAD USED AGAINST HER. SHE HAS SINCE STATED “DON’T BLAME THIS ON ACE PEOPLE, IT WAS ALL ME.”

NOT ONLY THAT, BUT SHE SAID SO TO A CIS GAY PERSON WHO SAID “LOL STOP BEING OFFENDED” WHEN SHE CALLED THEM OUT ON THEIR TRANSMISOGYNY.

IM SUPPORTING WHAT A TRANS WOMAN HAS SAID ABOUT THE TRANSMIOGYNY IN THE LGBT+ COMMUNITY AND OUTSIDE, AND IT BEING TERRIFYINGLY SIMILAR TO APHOBIA, AND IM DOING SO AS ONE OF THOSE TRANS BOYS YOU MENTIONED WHO’S BEEN SEXUALLY HARRASSED BY A TERF AND HAS EXPERIENCED THE SAME TYPE OF HATE, GATEKEEPING, AND HARRASSMENT FOR BEING ACE.

@acephobia-is-real
has to refer hundreds of people to the Trevor Project because so many ace/aro people are seeing disgusting cases of hatekeepers literally telling them to die, kill themselves, that no one cares about their identity or the experiences they have specific to being ace/aro. Young, suicidal aces/aros are seeing blatant hatred of aces/aros in the tags that are supposed to be specific to them. Not to mention the fucking 21 r old cis gays who have said to me, a sexual assault survivor, “That didn’t happen stop lying.” after I pointed out that yeah, aces experience corrective rape and therapy too.

This is putting people in physical danger of killing or hurting themselves.

No one is saying you guys are the exact same. We are saying that your rhetoric (specifically the “str8’s are str8’s” being similar to “males are males”) is terrifying, and as a mother fucking trans person, (who’s also been a victim of sexual assault more than once due to my acenes, and a survivor of a long term bullying scheme that consisted of corrective harassment and assault over the course of two years, as well as being pressured by my parents to receive corrective therapy to “fix” my aromanticism and asexuality) I’m going to fucking call out the similarities and how it is fucking disgusting, false, and putting real people in danger.

the reason I make these comparisons, the reason I say repeatedly that the logic anti-ace people use is the same as TWERF logic, is because i know JUST how serious the similarities are. i don’t do it as a joke, or for the lolz, like people bandy about “cishet” to the point where it’s lost meaning. i do it because people, rightfully, see TWERFs as bigots, and i hope, somehow, by making the comparison, someone will look at their rhetoric, their weapons and look at the people they claim to hate so much and realize they’re looking in a fucking mirror. and maybe they’ll decide to put the weapon down and do better because they don’t want to be like that. 

i know that the same people who will say “but cishet aces are straight sweaty (:” are the same people who have “don’t follow me if you’re terf” in their about. they KNOW how dangerous TWERFs are. and they’ll turn around and use the same language and the same rhetorical devices that TWERFs do. INCLUDING constant misgendering. the cognitive dissonance required to devow one group of bigots, and then put the same exact bigotry on another target is incredible. 

aphobic people have actively tried to stop the trevor project from training their suicide hotline about how to help ace teens. they wanted to take away resources that are helping suicidal kids. how is that not trying to get them killed? 

also, just as an fyi, there are trans people who are TWERFs and there are trans women who are TWERFs and they kick the shit out of their siblings just to get a seat at the table because of their internalized transphobia/transmisogyny. saying “you can’t call me a TWERF because i’m trans” is ridiculous because everyone can internalize shit and everyone can punch their siblings and no one gets a free pass for bigotry. 

/facepalm/ this is the post i was looking for, about having to refer hundreds of aces to the Trevor project because abuse from exclusionists makes them suicidal! I only had to google it?!

i misremembered the “per month” part is all

The other thing that is super important with pointing out TERF rhetoric like this is that TERFs do this on purpose! They say things that sound reasonable unless you can decode the message and hear the dogwhistles! We have a genuine serious problem with TERFs coming at young LB people on here and twitter – and they don’t get them with the “hey we hate trans women and want them dead” -rhetoric! They gotta be sly, they gotta play you. (PS the so-called “alt right” does this exact same thing, they start with the more “reasonable” sounding shit, this is literally bigot tactic 101). 

I’m sorry you didn’t recognise sneaky TERF rhetoric. I’m sorry you fell into the trap. But even if you were doing it by mistake, you gotta stop fucking spreading it. Now. You are making them seem more legitimate. You are hurting actual people with what you are doing. You either stop or someone will have to make you stop. Those are the only options. Hurting people must stop. 

This is very fucking true. The most obvious example I’ve found is the Feminist Current website. The entire thing is basically TERF rhetoric, framed in ways the average clueless cis person would totally agree with.

I’ve had to fucking fight multiple people on Facebook who posted stuff from it. And their damn friends. And I mean people who are actual friends, who have known me since before i transitioned, who would consider themselves to be trans allies.

Cis white women in particular, in my experience, tend to get really defensive about it immediately, and deny that what they shared is cissexist, transmisogynist TERF rhetoric. And then demand that you explain HOW it is. And then you’re stuck trying to explain this detailed, decades-long context for every phrase.

At least non-TERF exclusionists cut straight to “YOU’RE transphobic for even SUGGESTING such a thing! I know two trans women exclusionists and I’m going to try to hide behind them by acting like all exclusionists are trans women. Just admit you hate trans people!”

Or the ever-popular “lmao I’m nb,” where people who are not affected by transmisogyny try to pretend that it’s impossible to be trans AND be a fucking demon to trans women. And it’s ALWAYS people who aren’t affected by transmisogyny using it as a shield.

When I got to Tumblr and saw a ton of trans women being like “trans guys and nb people on that spectrum are NOT our allies, we have NOTHING in common, and they need to stay off my blog,” I was surprised. Because the community I came out into was way more integrated and mutually supportive, and most of the spaces were run by trans women.

But god-fucking-damnit if it isn’t true here. I read things like fucking sleepdontvisit’s bullshit post about how trans people have AAAALWAYS been a part of the community, and only TERFs ever tried to say different, and the acronym has ALWAYS been LGBT, and if you say otherwise you’re erasing the brave trans women in the Stonewall riots, and I’m just. So fucking embarrassed and angry with “my side”.

OK I swear I’m done ranting now.

I mean there’s posts by terfs actively recruiting aphobes and pointing out all the similarities and aphobic and nbphobic gatekeeping on this site was straight up created by bigots to help get their rhetoric into the common mind AND HAS ABSOFUCKINGLUTELY WORKED and created a hugely violent and unsafe place not only for aspec people but for non-cis and non-l/g LGBTQ+ people but yeah op go off I guess. And I hope one day you think about all the people you hurt and helped kill and feel super great about yourself.

I was just thinking last night that I’ve been in a lot of different online communities…

the local BBS, a text-based MMORPG, different newsgroups (alt.drwho.creative and some group for sharing and getting constructive criticism on poetry, for example), an RPG on AOL where my co-mods turned out to be really skeevy on having even lesbian relationships portrayed, some forum for nerds at my college, friendster, MySpace, Livejournal, Facebook, Twitter, off the top of my head)…

And none of them have been ANYTHING like this.

Other online communities are like… “Hey, there are a few jerks, but in general we try to treat each other with respect, especially on divisive topics. Ignoring or blocking the jerks is worth it, to find your people and talk about all the stuff no one else in your life understands or cares about.”

Tumblr is like, “Hey, there are a lot of really funny and interesting posts and you can learn a lot and meet amazing people, but also, complete strangers will routinely be really fucked up to you just for fun. And if you discuss any kind of divisive topic, or are a part of a hated group, many people will do their best to make you shut up and leave at best, or fucking kill yourself at worst. And a lot of them will obliviously complain about what a ‘hellsite’ this is while they do that.”

That was too long. How about:

Other communities are like: “welcome! Be cool to each other, block the haters!”

Tumblr is like, “Hating people is a fun sport! I hope you like looking at cute dogs, interspersed with all the bullying you can take and more! You can’t ever really block them, they’ll just do it behind your back until you see it! MUAHAHAHAHAHA 🐶 🐶 🐱 😻😾🙀🐕”